Drama

Yes, I sometimes get frustrated about how much drama there is in my friends' lives, and I do sometimes complain about it. 

However, most of the time, I think much of the drama is hilarious. Or, at least it is funny when I have to hear only one side of it. 

Scratch that, it is definitely funnier when I have to listen to both sides of the drama. However, it is difficult to keep track of who told me what part of which story. Somehow I always end up mixing up things, or blurting out things when I shouldn't, and getting sucked into the drama-licious whirlpools. Whoops. 

But, honestly, I enjoy that I only have to listen to other people's drama, and not deal with any of my own. That is a GOOD thing. It is actually a good thing. I have a hard time convincing myself that it is a good thing, because while I don't want the drama, I do want the things that lead to the drama (the hook-ups, the dating, the relationships, whatever). (Yes, whatever I need to tell myself. Not that I necessarily believe what I tell myself). 

But. DRAMA IS FUN!

So long as it is just funny, and is not ruining friendships (see last post for how drama could ruin friendships, and why that would be a bad thing). 

My awesome boys :)

One of my favorite thing about Georgetown are my boys. 

I honestly don't really have any close female friends here, but I do have some close guy friends and I absolutely love them. 

It would be absolutely degrading to the friendships I have with these boys to look at them as fag-faghag friendships, because they really are not. Sure, most (ok, all) of my boys are gay/bisexual but our friendships are definitely not based upon talking about boys, fashion and whatever those "Sex and the City" sort of stereotypes are. Besides, I would not and could not fit anyone's definition of a faghag, so that shouldn't even come into consideration (why did it then?). (Also, I find both those terms incredibly offensive and demeaning, so I don't know why I used them.)

I'm not sure I actually quite understand these friendships yet, in that there are some people I feel so close to that I could almost trust them with my life (well, it could only be almost because I have trust issues. And I should really stop inserting parenthetical statements to things that should be self-explanatory.). I don't think I ever had friendships so close before -- people that I talk to almost everyday without fail, see/hang out with nearly everyday, and most importantly, people that trust me enough to come talk to me about their lives. The last one is what is the thing that is newest for me, because I always felt like I trusted people with too much, too quickly, but never earned their trust in return. Now that I seem to have earned the trust of some people at least, it feels good. 

Also, I really cherish the fact that I can literally call one or the other of them when I am feeling low (which, this year, has unfortunately been too often) and know that they will listen, and will (sometimes) offer solid advice. That is also something I feel like I never really had before -- I definitely did with one friend (and hopefully, I still have that dynamic with her) but not with any more people. 

Yes, there are definitely major cultural differences between me and my friends. There would be, naturally, given how strikingly different my background is from any of theirs'. However, these differences, I think, sometimes make the friendships even richer, because it helps to look at things objectively at times, rather than getting caught up in cultural contexts and what is culturally appropriate or not. I know that sounds like an incredibly vague statement, but I am not sure how else to explain it. 

Knowing how insecure I am as a person, I do sometimes feel like I am far more invested in these friendships than they are. I also sometimes wonder if these friendships could last beyond the Healy gates, because we are so culturally different, and when I see my aunts and uncles' friends, they are all Indian, and my friends are not. However, I know for sure that I will cherish these friendships while I do have them, and I just feel lucky to be able to have them. (Especially considering how many people I think don't like me, but I won't discuss that, because I don't want to talk about the negative thoughts in my head). 

Post 1. Second Semester. Second Year. Introductory Post.

One of my closest friends asked why I never updated my blog(s) and the only answer I can think of to that is that I just feel too disconnected from my old blogs. It's strange that I feel disconnected though, because I find myself visiting them so often and wondering at how little I have changed. 

Therefore, this is, yes, yet another attempt to maintain a blog. I suppose blogs do help in that they help me gain some clarity of mind and purpose, and lord knows I need that. 

Sophomore year has been a mess so far, but it seems to be getting better. Maybe. I am not sure. 

However, it is definitely not all bad at all, and with this blog, I am going to write about at least one positive thing each time I update (and no negative things at all).